Thursday, October 20, 2011

Well, It Happened

The person, you know, that crispy fried Asian noodle that called me the other day and told me that someone would call?  Well, he did - this morning.  I -- was -- ready.  A man started realing off a bunch of words that couldn't be separated with a sharp knife and I stopped him flat.

"Stop.  Don't talk LOUDER, talk SLOWER.

He did.

Well, I want'ch  to know, I was blown away.  He was NICE.  He ruined my whole grouchy attitude.  I couldn't do anything but listen and answer his questions - in monotone - low monotone.  I was ready to be tacky and he pushed that tacky plumb out the door.

Now, guess what , I don't have to go pick up my blood testing suplies anymore, plus, I get a new meter.  He even wished me a good day.  I sat there like a dry, day old, Southern biscuit.  All I could think of to say was "thank you" and "good by".  He left me with a huge, huge hairlip.

Somestimes it is hard to change instantly from wanting to chew someone out and spit them in the trash, to being civil.  Especially when they have no idea that you've been gnawing on them for two days. 

I think what I had better do is give myself a serious attitude adjustment.  And I'm not talking about the way people on the phone upset me.  There's others that send me into outer space too, like drivers.

I don't have time, and should not worry about people throwing me into a tizzy.  I'm old enough to know that they can't do that if I don't let them.  So, from now on, I'm going to try to control myself.  I shall take the high road and let others have the gutter, thank you.

To begin, I've got a whole pot of fresh coffee in my kitchen, and I'm gonna go drink it.  May even have a piece of cake - or chocolate.  Shoot, I might even have both.  If you want a cup, come on by.  I promise to be nice.

Don't let anybody get'ch down - OK?

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

I Do Not Understand Asianeze

Just got off the phone with someone from China, Japan, Korea, or somewhere on this earth that speaks Chineze, Japaneze, Koreaneze or some kind of Asianeze, and I've got a world class headach.  Why do companies/organizations use people that do not speak English?  These people yell and speak so fast that my head feels like my brain has been assaulted by a word machine gun.

I think the first person - the voice was high pitched, but I'm not sure it was a lady.  That's OK, I'm afraid I wasn't one either.  However, I yelled back slow enough for it to understand, and after I yelled back about four times, it said - at least I think it said - that someone else would talk to me.

I waited.  Sure enough, another person came on the phone and yelled in the same Asianeze and our conversation continued.  I yelled in Southern and she yelled in bullets, high pitched bullets. 

As near as I could tell, I was being called about a new meter to check my blood sugar.  I already have the testing equipment.  I am on Medicare.  I do not want to cause Medicare any more costs than necessary.  I think I understood her to say she was calling from the American Diabetes Association.  Why do they not get someone that we can understand, that speaks English in a moderate tone of voice.  I had to hold the phone six inches from my ear to understand anything.  I'm not hard of hearing, but if you have to ask what was said again, they just yell louder.  I asked her to please slow down and not speak so loud.  Didn't help.

At the end of the second persons spiel, or rather after she got tired of us yelling back and forth, I think she said that someone else would call.  I have no idea who, why, or when. 

Whoops, the phone just rang.  I answered and when he said "Hello" I asked if he was calling from the American Diabetes Association.  "No", he said, he was calling from  the "&%&*(#&^ government grants".  I asked "WHAT grants"  he repeted "@#$)(*&E^ grants".  I asked him to spell it. He did - "@)(&*$#".  I hung up.  It was another telephone person speaking Asianeze.  At least he wasn't yelling.

Now, I have completely lost my train of thought, and have no idea of what I intended to say.  I'm going to stop and go take a pill. 

I do hope you will have a good day, and if I get another call and it's someone speaking Asianeze, I'm just gonna hang up.  Take Care, will ya?