Dang I Hate Telephone Menus

Today is Monday.  So far I have tried to talk to Medicare, two doctor's offices, my insurance agent, and the church.  My blood pressure is probably sky high and I didn't even have high blood pressure.  The church is the only place I've called and not gotten a gazillian options to get to the person I wanted.  Thank goodness for Beckie - and I hope I spelled her name right - at the church, or I'd have gotten a long menu there.

At Medicare I only wanted to ask a question, so I called the number given.  Big mistake.  I didn't have my Medicare card in front of me so I hung up, but not before I found out the web site.  Went to the web site. Only wanted to ask a question.  First I had to make application for an account.  After three tries I finally got that done.  Then I was told to go back to my account.  Did that.  Went through the entire information of the whole web site and would you believe there is NO place to ask a question?  If you don't believe me and you have half a day to waste, give it a try.

After that I called the insurance company to find out why no adjuster has been out since my claim was re-opened for water damage to my home.  The lady I talked to said she would find out and call back.  Only took two hours to find out that my claim had been totally denied.  The insurance company people insisted I call a carpet company to have them dry out my carpets,and that was after I told them that if the claim would be denied I didn't want to file a claim.  Now I am minus carpet in one room totally and part of the pad in another, due to their insistence that I call a company.  I was going to do the drying out myself if there was a chance the claim would be denied.  I'm so mad I could chew up nails and spit them out as bullets.

Then I called my dentist to make an appointment to have a broken tooth filled or what ever they do, and was told by an answering machine that my dentist office closes as two on Monday.

Figured if he could close on Monday afternoon, he didn't need my money so I called another dentist office.  Have an appointment at one thirty tomorrow, but I have to take antibiotics before I get there so had to call my doctor's office.

At the doctor's office there were so many opportunities on the menu that I gave up and punched 0,  After a short wait a pleasant voice said to leave the information and someone would get back to me - when, I have no idea.  I left my information so now I wait.  All I wanted was for the doctor to call in a prescription for the antibiotics.

You know, life was so much more simple before telephone menus.  From now on I'm gonna start punching 0 at first.  It works for ATT, and now I know it works at the doctor's office.  Medicare, shoot, does anybody work there anyway, except maybe the person figuring out all those menus.

Have You Ever Seen A Wrinkled Nose?

It may be because I took my shower late this morning and my eyes were fully open, but when I looked in the mirror the only part of my face that didn't have wrinkles was my nose.  Now, I'm not talking about that line where my glasses have been sitting for the last 100 years, I'm talking about the main nose, you know, that part where air goes in and out.  Mine looks the same as always, not pretty, large and fat, but it's not wrinkled.

Mother didn't have wrinkles on her face, at least not many, and they weren't deep, but then I've outlived her by seven years already.  I don't remember Daddy having any wrinkles at all.  Men don't seem to have that problem.  If they do, it just adds character.  Adds character to women too - just not the right kind.

Now Grandma had wrinkles - major wrinkles.  You hear people say "She's got a road map on her face."  Well Grandma had several road maps on hers.  Believe me, she had plenty of character too, even being a Baptist preacher's wife.  Holy macaroni, it appears I'm gonna look just like her - at least in the face. She was an even six feet tall and her top weight was one hundred five.  If I stretched to six feet I wouldn't get down to a hundred five.  However, my wrinkles aren't quiet as bad as hers - yet.  'Course, I've outlived her too.

Mother faithfully used Ponds Cold Cream every night, so, years ago I bought a big jar.  Been usin' that Ponds Cold Cream every since.  Still I'm gettin' those blasted wrinkles.  Well, just last week a friend and I made a trip to Dillard's, because Estee Lauder was havin' a promotion where if you spent thirty five dollars you got a bunch of free stuff.

I bought Perfectionist -Wrinkle Lifting Serum, Corrector for Lines/Wrinkles/Age Spots.Think it cost somewhere around fifty to sixty bucks.  Along with cleanser, lipstick, and eye shadow I received (free) Time Zone - Line and Wrinkle Reducing Cream SPF15.  At home, I looked in a drawer and along with some Avon Dramatic Firming Cream, that my friend gave me, and my Ponds Cold Cream, I found several tubes and jars of Mary Kay Time Wise (age fighting stuff), some Estee Lauder Resilience (firming lotion I paid about eighty smackers for in Dallas years ago), some prescription lanolin they gave me in the hospital a couple of years ago because my face and lips were dry and cracking, and a tube of Equate Hemorrohoidal Cream that somebody said was good for wrinkles.  You know, if I use all that slicky stuff at one time, my face might just slide right off my head.

But I bet I wouldn't have wrinkles on my nose.

Been to the Post Office Lately?

Went to the  Post Office this afternoon.  Got out of my car at 2:19, sat back down in it at 2:46.  Twenty seven minutes to mail three small packages, two Priority mail and one First Class, no insurance, no nothing, "just mail them" I said.

When I got in line, two windows out of four were open, and the clerk at one was leaving.  He went somewhere in  back.  Where?   I don't know, maybe to take a nap.  He just left his window.

There were five people besides me in line.  A lady clerk took her time waiting on a customer at the other window.  Three men and two women were before me.  Three were on electric thing-a-ma-jigs, cell phones or such.  I think two were texting and one man just kept looking at a little black object in his hand.

When I left the line was almost out the door, at least twelve to fifteen people.  One elderly lady came in carrying on a conversation, and I do believe she and the one she was talking to were both deaf, and it was a  l-o-n-g conversation.  She was still talking when I left.  At least one young parent was among the crowd, because a small kid kept running around yelling.  No one seemed to claim him, but then I wouldn't have either.  Don't know what the others were doing - I just glanced around and saw a lot of bored faces.  I felt the same and I didn't want anyone I knew to see me.

Years ago the public was told that the U.S. Postal System was changing and would be run like a business.  Well, have you ever seen the government run anything like a going business?  The post office boss should be ashamed, because no business I have seen has been run like our postal service.  Nor will it ever be and stay in business.  But then, we support it - right?

Never saw the clerk that left the room again, but his glasses were on the counter.  Years ago at Texas Tech, I had a professor that was always tardy, but his hat would be on his desk.  He let the class know that if his hat was on his desk, he was there.  So I guess the clerk was 'there'. 

I wish I could have done like the students at Tech did and left my packages on the counter.  The next time that class met, every student put a hat on his desk and left.  But that didn't turn out too well either.  Next time they came to class the professor told them that he had given their hats a test and they all flunked.

Sometimes there is just no way to win.

I'm Gonna Quit Fussing About the Snow

Yep, I'm gonna stop fussin' about the snow as of today.  At least for a little while.  You know what they say about gripping because you are on crutches until you see a man who has no feet.  Or somthing like that.

Today I was driving in my little BMW down Coulter, a major thoroughfare. The temperature outside was a cold twenty something.  Inside, it was a cozy seventy four deg., I had my seat warmer on, and I was going to a doctor's appointment for a check-up.Traffic was slight because there is snow about six inches deep, up to drifts of two feet or more.  Yes, I was complaining to myself about having to get out in the cold weather, when I saw a lady walking by the side of the street.

The lady had on what looked like a warm, full-length black coat.  I couldn't tell how old she was from the rear, but she seemed to be stumbling, even though she picked her steps carefully.  I, like everyone else, drove on by.  But then I got to thinking.  In this neighborhood, absolutely no one would be out walking  unless their car had broken down, or they lived in the low-income apartments about two blocks down the street.  She seemed to be headed toward the apartment complex, which is known to be home to some needing an inexpensive place to light temporarily, or for a few that are two cookies short of a full bag.  Either of those two situations would be reason enough for me to help.

By the next corner I felt bad about passing and not offering the poor lady a ride, so, after two blocks, and four right turns, I put on my hazzard lights, pulled up beside her and stopped.  Rolling down my front passenger window,  I called "Can I give you a ride?"  She just headed straight for my car and I could tell she was really anxious to get in. 

She had snow on one side of her face, and coat as if she had fallen.  Whe she sat down, she only said "I'm going right down there to those apartments.  It's not far, just right down the street," and pointed.  When she did, I noticed a shoe full of snow in her hand.   "I lost my other shoe," she added.  And then I saw her feet.  The poor thing had on no shoes, no socks - nothing on her feet.  They were a bright, blotchy red, and she was shivering.

At the apartment complex, she directed me to her door.  I drove as close to it as I could.  When she got out I watched as she walked in the snow, shaking while she opened her purse, got her keys, dropped them, picked them up from the snow, and opened her door. 

I backed almost all the way out before I saw the sign - 'One Way.  Too bad, I thought and kept backing until I was able to turn around and continue on my way to the doctor's office.  My check-up turned out fine, but I can't seem to get the lady out of my mind.  I hope and pray that she is okay.  And I don't think I'll be complaining about the snow or being cold for some time.

What If

Was sitting in the hot tub and got to thinking.  Most of the world news is bad and the weather has been beyond bad all over, so, what if the earth could be having contractions, or the beginning of labor pains?  Now, if the earth has labor pains, what does that mean?  The Bible mentions 'end times' in several places so what if this could be the beginning of the end times?  What does 'end times' mean?

Now I am no scholar, no scientist, not much of anything except an old woman, but, what if at the end of Mother Earth's labor pains she explodes, and in that explosion thousands of little bits and pieces scatter in all directions of our universe?

Some of these chunks, or whatever you want to call them, would get too close to the sun and burn up, some some might dissapear into a black hole, some would just fly off into space in whatever direction they started, but a few, say five, fifty, five hundred or so, might be large enough to cause new baby planets.   What if some of these new planets were encased in atmosphere as we know it.  And what if life might exist on them.

Okay, say you have four kids.  One lives in San Fricisco, another lives in New York, the third is visiting in Paris, and the last one is on a mission trip in Africa, or South America.  You are in Amarillo, Texas.  Each of you happens to end up on a different newly formed planet, far away from the other family members.  These new planets might be as large and a continent, country, or state.

What if people have survived and are on each of these planets.  Naturally the strongest and smartest will take charge.  They will form new governments.  New classes of people can emerge.  Therre might even be slaves.  Using the natural resources of each new planet, and differente people that ended up on each of them, a "new" civilization would be formed. 

For instance, those from the San Francisco area might grow grapes for wine, along with whatever else grows around there now.  The ones from  New York could grow grapes too, and the Paris pople definately would.  I don't know what is grown in Africa and South America, but I do hope the Ruby Red Grapefruit would be prevalent for those of us Texas folks.  As far as industry is concerned, I am going to leave that for those people on the new planets to figure out.  But you get my drift.

What if after years, even centuries, future generations managed to travel from one planet to another and found that the DNA from their current population matched that of other planets?  Hmm.

Well, I'm not a sicience fiction writer, but it any of you out there are, get in touch and I'll tell you the rest of the story.  But remember I want my part from the sale of books, and especially the movie rights.

I sure do need to call a plumber

Have you ever had one drain partially stopped up, while all the other drains work fine?  That's what's going on at my house.

For the past two months (or it might be three, since I haven't been keeping count) the drain where my washing machine is connected, has been acting up.  The kitchen sink is connected to the same drain and it works fine, however, it does cause the drain at my washer to gurggle once in a while.  All the bathroom drains work OK.  Back before the first of the year I didn't do anything about it because I didn't want to spend the money, didn't have the time, needed to clean the house, and besides it was close to Christmas.  Shoot, I just didn't want to fool with a plumber. 

Along came January.  Haven't done laundry since before Christmas,  and  I'm almost out of  'you know what'.  It's almost February and I haven't called the plumber yet.

Well, yesterday I couldn't put off doing my laundry any longer.  I cleaned all the junk off the top of the washer and dryer so that I could get started.  Sheets first.  Last time I did the washing, I found that I could set the water level on low and the drain worked fine.  If I set it on medium and stopped it in the middle of draining, I could wait a minute then start it draining again and it wouldn't run over.  Took fifteen washer cycles, about a hundred gallons more water, and three days to get four large loads washed.  But I didn't have to clean up any water.

I don't know how it took me so long to figure out that I could just fill that sucker up, pile a full load in, and let 'er go.  All I have to do is stop the machine twice while it's draining.  Hey, tried that and it worked.  I did have to stay close by in order to hear when the washer quit swishing and started draining, but more got washed at one time.  I only let water spew out the drain, down the wall and onto the floor  three times in three loads.  Took a lot less time and used less water and soap.

Since three loads were all I managed to get done yesterday, I'm back at it again today.  Only have three more loads to do.  That is, if I put some never-washed red towels in with my jeans.  If I decide that I don't want to take a chance of my jeans coming out a wierd offish blue/pink color, it's  gonna take four. I sure do need to call a plumber.     

Is it a sin to lie to your dog?

Well, it's Monday morning and I've got a problem. I know I said that this post would be my opinion of the way old men wearing hats drive, but as usual things aren't working out the way I thought they would.

Now, back to my problem.  From the time I could say "No", my mother taught me to always tell the truth.  It's good advice and I do believe one should.  However,  here's where Mr. Problem comes in.  I have two little dogs.  They tend to puddle on the floor in the living room.  That's not the worst part.  They 'go' on an antique Aubison rug.  Now, if I say "I'm going to church", and have on something beside jeans, they seem to understand that I'll be back soon, and they are 'usually' good.

One is a male dachshund and the other is a female designer dog - half dachshund and half German Shepherd/Pit Bull/junk yard.   Their names are Oliver and Blossom.  I call Oliver, Olie for short, and got him when he was ten weeks old.  Blossom's name was Rosie when I got her.  She was a year old, had been a shelter dog, abused as a pup, and had the attitude that she was not going to like me.  She didn't like anyone, and would only tolerate me because she liked Olie.  She did not look like a 'Rosie' so I named her Blossom.  I'd had a pet named Blossom and I could remember it.  Besides I was determined that she WOULD blossom into a good dog.

Back to my problem.  Recently one Sunday evening I was attending a party at my son, Wesley's house.  I didn't dare say I was going to his house because they know the word Wesley, and they adore him.  They also get to go to his house where they always get treats.  I knew if I told them the truth, I would be faced with a major mess-up.  Not only would I have pee all over the floor, most likely there would be smelly truffles scattered all over the floor.  So---I lied.  I said I was going to church.

Since then my conscience has been bothering me.  Not only did I lie to a couple of my best friends, I lied about where I was going.  Now these two little animals cannot possibly understand all this, so it doesn't bother them.  But I know.  And the Man Upstairs knows.

I asked several friends what they thought.  Was it a lie, or not?  Some said "No."  Others said a lie is a lie is a lie.  Finally I asked my daughter.  Bless her heart she explained to me why it was not a lie and my mind was put to rest--- that is until today.  I tried to remember what she said.  I'd like to ask her again, but she'd think I've gone nuts.  So, what do you think.  Was it or was it not a lie?